lord berri SpEaKs

...

2012-02-01T20:43:00.001+08:00

angry i am...

but i just don't have the heart to be mad...

haishhhh

I Miss You

2012-02-01T20:41:00.000+08:00

hidup itu hanyalah sementara

2012-01-27T13:06:00.003+08:00

pagi ku dikejutkan dengan panggilan berita buruk...

panggilan yang membawa berita tentang pemergian seorang insan bernama Tokwan...

dia bukanlah atok ku...

namun atuk kepada seorang insan yang ku sayangi...

baru semalam dia memberi tahu kepada ku Tokwan x sihat...

daripada apa yg diberitahu kepada aku secara ringkasnya...

Tokwan hanya demam...

dia telahpun ke rumah Tokwan untuk memberi panadol untuk mengubati demam Tokwan...

namun...

takdir telah tertulis...

perjumpaan itu adalah perjumpaan terakhirnya bersama Tokwan...

siapa tahu...

esok harinya dia akan meninggal dunia..

Inalillah...

Tuhan lebih menyayangi Tokwan...

bukan saja Tokwan terselamat dari menghadapi penyakit...

namun Allah telah menjemputnya pulang ke-Rahmatullah...

moga rohnya ditempatkan dikalangan orang-orang yang berIman...

insyallah...

neglected...

2012-01-23T14:10:00.001+08:00

hello blog...

its been quite sometime that i paid u a visit...

really long while...

i've been busy i guess...

adapting to classes again and all the otherthings in life u know...

first off..,

alhamdulillah...

i'm alreadt into my semester 8 of medical school...

insyallah 2 more semesters and life begins...

that would be a whole new chapter to write on...

we'll just have to wait and see for that day to come...

so a lil update on the months that been neglecting u...

last post was august...

that makes it almost 4 moths plus of stories to write here...

so in the past semester i took 2 subjects...

they were Family Medicine and Orthopaedics...

i enjoyed both the postings however if i was allowed to choose one of the 2...

i'd choose Family Medicine over Ortho...

Fam Med allows me more interations with patients and and covers a wider scope of medicine..

however not in depth...

thats what i like...

superficial stuff no need to pulun ur kepala and learn until molecular level and all...

ortho on the other hand is a dull and boring subject in my opinion...

i dont deny that there are alot of fractures and other bone related disease...

however i say its dry cuz the variety of cases i was exposed to were very limited...

given the fact that most ortho patients tend to stay long oin the ward...

so yea thats the academics part...

in other news...

this year hasn't been a good one in terms of my health...

i was admitted twice this year for two different reasons...

first admission was for a severe infected eczema...

dont ask me how i got that or even what the hell is that...

hahaha...

too long to explain...

so yea...

i was admitted to Tawakkal Specialist Hospital for 5 days...

and alhamdulillah...

i am well now...

my second admission was for severe gastritis..

for that i was admitted to Selayang Hospital...

and yes anither whole week...

what happened was...

the night prior to my admission...

i felt slight GERD like symptoms...

knowing i have gastritis and all its medication...

i sorta tried to trat myself...

sadly it didn't work...

so...

the next day after breakfast...

the pain was unbearable...

it was like a heart attack kinda pain...

so mom took me to the A&E...

and...

Voilaaa...

kena masuk hospital...

in the midst of all the havoc....

2011-08-11T03:32:00.002+08:00

i've been short of time lately...

meaning to say time has gotten the better side of me...

leaving me to always rush for things...

haihzzz...

first off...

i missed out on my end of semester 6 or year 3 holiday...

not to say miss out totally, but its just that i felt it wasn't utilized properly....

the first week of holidays...

i had plan to settle thing before leaving for umrah...

but as fate had its way...

Tok Burn fell sick and was admitted to Selayang Hospital...

he started off purging and somehow developed pneumonia...

at 83 or is 84, pneumonia can be life threatening...

so yea... my days were wasted... well not nice lah to say wasted...

lets say... i spent quality time at the ward with Tok Burn who was delirious half the time of not three quarter...

speaking of umrah...

my 2nd and 3rd week of holidays...

i went to for umrah....

it was a really good experience...

like REALLY GOOD....

my time there... all i had to do was think about going for prayers and waiting for time to eat...

other wise there is nothing to worry about...

though prior to the event...

i somewhat was a lil scared...

though part of me was excited...

but fear got the better side of me...

i was excited because i was finally able to achieve something that i've always wanted to do...

which is go Mekkah...

it has always been my dream to be able to be His visitor at a young age...

at a tender age where i was still a good boy...

but guess that didnt happen...

dah terlanjut usia baru nak pegi jumpe tuhan...

bila dosa dah bertimbun,,,

ish ish ish...

oh well i'm still glad i went though it was later then i hped it would have been...

Alhamdulillah...

it was good...

the first time seeing Ka'abah at 12 am Mekkah time...

i was shiverng to my core when i walked towards Masjidil Haram...

questions was and doubts were filling my mind...

questions like....

will i actually get to see the ka'abah...

or will He test me and blind me from seeing it...

you all those fears of hearing peoples experience...

but Alhamdulillah...

there IT was...

the Holy Black Structure...

after stepping into Masjidil Haram...

a sense of calmness and "kesayuan" filled this soul...

a few steps further in... and i fell to my knees...

i may have dropped a tear or two...

but the feeling was just incredible...

Masya-Allah!!!!

there i was... the feeling of wanting to break down and cry...

wow it was just incredible beyond words...

over 11 days plus there i managed to perform only 4 umrahs...

x larat... as it was my first time...

i managed to witness the washing of kaabah... not the change of kelambu...

but just an annual event where the Mayor of Makkah inspects the inside of kaabah...

i was able to witness the kaabah door open..

Alhamdulillah praise be to Him Allah swt...

Insyallah...

i tried to pray for all those who pesan their prayers...

ade yg mintak jodoh...

mintak permudah segala urusan...

mintak kawen cepat...

etc... etc...

whether He answers and terima my prayers...

itu, wallahualam...

of course i prayed myself too la...

hahahah....

ok thats all...

adios...

see my fb for some Makkah picts...

;)

2011-07-29T22:39:00.000+08:00

“We write a book about us and our relationship, but i’ll keep it short by letting everyone know he is the best damn thing that has EVER happened to me. I love u”

guess no more....

2011-07-19T23:49:00.002+08:00

insane fanatics

2011-07-16T03:49:00.005+08:00

everyone is entitled to their opinion...
so what...
whats the need of getting emotional....

weak fool

2011-07-16T03:40:00.002+08:00

now he decides to get personal...
but thank you for at noticing the fact that i care if there is chaos and havoc...
I'm surprised a person of his "religious stature" isn't....

baik punya cilok!!!

2011-07-13T02:28:00.002+08:00

i was browsing through blog...
jumping here and there...
skipping there and here...
and so i cam across this particular blog...
its written by a student of some place somewhere in Malaysia...
i truly respect the way she thinks and places things in perspective...

do read...

Mana terima kasih?
Salam.

Sememangnya hangat isu BERSIH. Tapi entri kali ini, aku bukan nak menyentuh tentang BERSIH sebab aku tidak layak untuk bercakap tentang politik dan perkara perkara yang sewaktu dengannya. Aku hanya ingin bercakap tentang perkara yang logik akal.

Eh, seronok pula baca manusia manusia yang tak reti berterima kasih ini memaki hamun polis. Wah wah wah, ada saja yang tak kena. Ini tak patut, itu tak patut. Pandai sungguh berkata kata. Pernah jadi polis sebelum ni bang? Pernah jadi polis sebelum ni kak? Oh, tak pernah. Berhujah macam pernah ja. Apa kata abang dan kakak ni pi ganti ketua polis kita tu. Mana la tau ada idea lagi bagus. Haaa, tau pon takut.

Can you imagine, how hard they work and can you at least put a small thankyou for what they've done? Susah sangat ka? Mahal sangat nak cakap terima kasih? Sibuk sangat kritik. Polis ni pembunuh. Pacik tu mati sesak nafas, sebab hidu gas pemedih mata kononnya, semua salah polis. Bukan nak cakap pasal ajal, tp polis yang dipersalahkan. Polis bertindak ganas, gari tak buang, tendang orang, maki orang, jerit sana jerit sini. Habistu, dah kata demonstrasi haram, yang datang bukan seorang bawak sepanduk, kalau macam tu bagi anjing kejar pon settle. Ni tidak, yang datang tu pon segerombolan, semua set set kepala masam yang tidak tahu mengikut arahan, agak agak nya dengan hanya berdiam diri, puak puak itu akan meleraikan perhimpunan haram tu ka? Fikir logikla. nak suruh polis buat baik baik, nak cakap macamna? Nak cakap lembut macam orang bercinta? Nak suruh polis buat sembahyang jemaah tengah tengah tu, angkat tangan doa, senjata semua tk payah bawak, macam tu ka nak? Macam tu boleh leraikan samseng samseng jalanan ka? Semua polis salah. Habis yang p Bersih tu macam na? Okayyy, maybe yang p Bersih tu inginkan keadilan dan tuntutan yang aku sendiri tak pasti, tapi bacalaah. Jangan main hentam. Yang join tu pon, sebab dapat duit, bukan betul betul dan nakkan keamanan dan keadilan terhadap negara. Ingat senang ka nak deal dgn orang orang macam ni?

Abang, kakak, pacik, macik, MAMPUKAH?

Kalau tak, cakap saja terima kasih. Jangan nak macam macam. Polis tu, dengan emosi dia lagi, makan tk cukup, makan tepi longkang, tidoq tak cukup, tinggai anak bini, masa untuk diri sendiri pon takdak, duit pon tak dapat, kerja lebih masa, depa buat ni untuk apa? untuk semua, rakyaaat malaysia, tk kira la sapa pon. So at least, hargai laaa depa. Hargai ! Mungkin depa bertindak kasar, tapi cuba fikir, kalau pacik macik abang kakak semua duduk dalam keadaan depa, dan tatkala memberi arahan tiada orang mahu dengar, akhirnya kekerasan lah yang digunakan. Ibu soleh mana pon kalau dah penat, dia akan marah juga. Tolong fikirkan sejenak.

for the time is now....

2011-05-15T00:16:00.003+08:00

being away from city has somewhat been a blessing for my emotions...
though it partly tormented by just being away...
but the already hurt and confused part of my emotions took it as sometime off to decide on things...

well...
if ur reading this posting and have read all my other recent blabbing..
this is to sum it all up...

its not wrong to say that i did some soul searching...
as i felt that i was at a crossroad of things...

i would say the 2 months away was really meaningful...
yes i was in a dilemma..
of having to decide on certain things...
needing to choose between two...
at the same time....
having to consider my feelings...
others feelings too...
risking friendship ties...
and lots more at stake...
it was hard...

it kind of got me a lil distracted...
but i guess...
HE has somehow made it easy...
i need not hurt anyone...
or at least i think so...
lets hope i am right...

things are gonna be different now...
i'm going back to a place that i'm familiar with...
to a territory where i once roamed like a stallion...
to a place where i knew everything...
but...
that was years ago...
when i rode around like a stud...
knowing things in and out at every nook and cranny...

its about to start all over again...
but with a different twist...

adios Manjung...

2011-05-15T00:11:00.001+08:00

and so its goodbye Manjung...
i'm back to the place where i rightfully belong...
in my kingdom of Petaling jaya...
ok la not my kingdom...
but...
my kingdom la...
hahahah...

tak percaya ka??

2011-05-09T17:26:00.001+08:00

i'll try not to...

2011-05-08T23:01:00.000+08:00

am in it?

2011-05-08T22:55:00.002+08:00

not ready...

2011-05-08T22:03:00.000+08:00

mixed feelings

2011-05-05T00:01:00.002+08:00

hullloooo...
hello...
halo...

i've just read my previous posting in this blog...
i must say...
it doesn't really reflects me...
well at least i claim so...
i don't think its the conscious me...
but it could however be the sub-conscious me...
hmmm...
a point to ponder upon...

reading back the reason posting it amazes me...
how much i've been in touch with inner-self...
WOW...
looking at older posting somewhat brings back a lil memory of who i really am...
ranting and bull shitting on current issues...
political issues...
daily issues...
everything that dissatisfy me la...
but yea mostly on the current political matters...
something i'm totally engrossed with...
not really my passion but something that i just like...

nanti edit lagi la....

O 'm' G

2011-05-02T20:53:00.002+08:00

the title was purposely written in that manner...

hi...
i'm currently doing my obstetrics and gynecology posting...
in short its supposed to be O&G...
or to some its also known as ObGyn...
so yearghh...

AS FOR O'M'G...
its actually a short form for oh my god...
or for some...
ohmaigawd...
ke... amalad...
macm2 la....

but to the point...
i just wanted to express my feelings of shock and thankfulnes...
thus...
oh my god...

i've seen ppl beranak...
meaning ppl sang-chai...
giving birth...
dan segala maksud yg sewaktu dgn nye...

its been gruesome yet joyful experience...
gruesome because a baby coming out...
the pain a mother has to endure... bringing u out to this world...
the pain and suffering a mom has to bare for 9 months...
yada yada yada....

joyful... because...
because la...
hahahah....
its a joyful experience because of the site of a new life be brought to this earth...
the site of a smiling baby face...
the sound of that first. cry....
its such a miracle...
the wonders of nature and..
the power of the Almighty Allah swt...

to all...
appreciate ur mom...
be thankful...
never hurt her...
dan segala yang sewaktu denganye..

appreciate ur wives..
or wives to be...
for they will be the one baring ur legacy....

ok dah ngantuk... goodnite...

of JenAn and JLo

2011-05-01T19:31:00.000+08:00

There are times when a man has to say what's on his mind...
Even though he knows how much it's gonna hurt...

Before I say another word..
Let me hold you close...
and say these words as gently as I can...

There's just this empty place inside of me...
that only one can fill...

Torn between two lovers, feelin' like a fool
Lovin' both of you is breakin' all the rules

dear friend...

2011-04-26T19:34:00.002+08:00

dear friend..
its been a while since i've said hello to u...
its been a really long while since we met each other...

time really hasn't been kind too me...
with the hectic week i had...
numerous numbers of projects to run and start...
i at times wish i had more then 24 hours in my day...

dear friend...
its been a while since i keluar with u...
even if its just to sit and drink while forcing u to read...
or talk nonsensicalness over hours...
well not hours... but figuratively...

i too realized that i've somewhat lost track of u friend..
but its not something i'm doing on purpose...

its good to know ur doing great over there...
alhamdulillah...

i hope to see u around soon...
like when i'm back...

p/s
i'm turning another year older next month...
i hope i become wiser tooo....

Manjung-ified

2011-04-26T19:13:00.002+08:00

so here i am again back to the depressing town of Manjung...
well its really no that depressing...
just that i've set some negative thoughts about it...
so yea... its all negative now...

i'm here for another 3 weeks of which i hope would fly faster then any military jet known to mankind...
like that'll ever happen lah kan...
i must say this is another test to my patience...

there are time when i feel that i'm a bit mengada...
but hey..
i grew up in town all my life and how would u expect me to survive outside town...
not to say that i cant survive outside town per se...
its just that it take a whole lot of time for me to adapt to such changes...

on another note...
i have yet to witness another delivery...
however i have heard moms screaming in pain...
one can only imagine the site of pain...

till the next time....
adios amigos...

no more chasing....

2011-04-21T09:51:00.000+08:00

Years of running and chasing is soon to be over...
Penat dah mengejar...
X penah2 dapt...
And now out of the blues tanpa disedari...
Ade yg mengejar dalam diam...

Is this it??
Could it be??

mom and dad taught us to be naughty...

2011-04-20T11:57:00.000+08:00

Dear Parents,
Jasmine was in a relationship with a dirty homeless boy named Aladdin.
Snow White lived alone with 7 men.
Pinnochio was a liar.
Robin Hood was a thief.
Tarzan walked around without clothes on.
A stranger kissed sleeping beauty and she married him.
Cinderella lied and snuck out at night to attend a party.
You can't blame us. We were taught to rebel since a young age.

its Friday night...

2011-04-15T19:33:00.003+08:00

That means party night....
Drinking night...
Chicks night...
Let's drink off all the worlds problem...

Ok adios...
Let's get drunk...

Oh shit..
Tomoro I have a program...
how am I gonna give a welcoming speech if I get a hangover??
Errr...

Ok I'm just joking...
But yes I have an event tomoro..
And yes I drink.. The O, milo ais, the ais and the tarik...
So don get me wrong... ;)

On another note...
Some man are afraid of a lil' competition that they got not balls to talk it thru...
Instead they opt to become a pussy...
I tried to help..
But ur ego was to much...
That aint how a gentlemen solve problem..
Be rational... You clearly didn't have it...
Is this the kind of boy a girl would want??
Lu pikir la sendiri....

Ok penat dah...
Nak tido... Keje banyak... Tapi esok punye program lagi penting...

Arividecci...

happy birthday Mak Cik Bedah...

2011-04-15T00:26:00.002+08:00

today is mak cik bedah's birthday...
who is mak cik bedah??
my adek... her name is afeefah...
why call her makcik bedah???
because when she berleter she is worse then my nenek... hahahah...
so yeah...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SISTA>>>>
Birthday Number what eh???

gotta tell u...

2011-04-12T22:14:00.005+08:00

yeay yeay yeay... iyeay yeay....
that special feeling just burst inside...
it was only u... nobody else...
but baby... i know better now....

ok the above were excerpts from Samantha Mumba's song...
the title is the same as this postings title...
however what ever i am about to write has no relevance to the title postings title...
so yea... i didn't have an idea for the postings title...
so i've decided to just put what i was listening on my ipod...

wokeyh....
so today i feel like babbling on life and gambling...
its a lil' cliche to talk about but yeargghh...

life is life as it is...
there really is nothing much to talk about...
beacuse everyone lives them differently..
however all human and mannkind have one thing in common in living their lives...
that is gambling...
yessss...
gambling in life...
and no i dont mean the lottery gambling, choh tai ti or da ma chai or toto or whatever la..

however i do mean taking chances in life...
isnt that pretty much the same as gambling??
taking chances...
no matter how much u evaluate things and weigh it s pros and cons...
at the end of the day it pretty much don seem to end the way u expect it...

its something u just cant avoid...
u need to gamble and take chaces in order to know things...
especially things pertaining to the heart...
i'm the biggest gambler...
however i've learnt that its can hurt u so badly and make u happy like never before...

oh yes i've gambled alright...
and yes... i did take my time to evaluate things...
weigh its pros and cons...
there are times which i 'win' however most of the time i 'loose'..
easy to say...
i mmg bukan kaki gambling la...

now.. coming back to the topic...
hmmm...
why did i write about this again...
oh yea...
eh...
i dunno la...
i just wanted to write something..
so here goes nothing...
hahahah....

just remember...
life is all about gambling...
no hopes...
no chances...
just plain ol'Gambling...

blardy exam....

2011-04-12T22:14:00.001+08:00

the time has come...

2011-04-11T10:49:00.004+08:00

its time to snap out of this fantasy and get back to reality...
it was nice while it lasted...
but i know it just a mere fiction...
nothing more then a mirage of denial...

first there was one...
then there was two...
now there is three...

maybe i'm better off with none...
ok maybe that's a lie....

on another note....
MOHD SYAFIQ ISMAIL BIN AZMAN...
study pleaseeeeee.... esok exam laa...
lepas tu ko nak ronggeng mak kiah ke...
pergi clubbing ke...
pergi mane ke...
lantaq hang la...
now...
STUDY laaaaaa...

Surat Cinta Untuk Future Wife(s) - 1 pon cukup actually... dah bole kasi poning kepalo...

2011-04-11T10:39:00.004+08:00

Surat Cinta Untuk Future Wife(s) -

Assalamualaikum

Kehadapan my future wife(s)

So, wahai my future wife(s)

I don't know who the hell are you and I have no idea where you are right now. But one day, bila kita dah berjumpa, I harap you mampu terima I seadanya seperti mana I akan terima you dan diri you sebenarnya. Lagi pun, I tahu yang you ni memang comel. Dan baik. Dan rajin. Dan alim. Dan cun.

I berharap bila I check facebook you nanti, you tidak letak banyak gambar you yang daring-daring kat facebook. Sebab, setahu I, kalau perempuan tu comel, mesti nak tunjukkan ke seluruh dunia. Macam lah dia sorang je yang comel. I comel tak ada pun letak gambar kat facebook tunjuk ke seluruh dunia. Boleh je hidup. Ehem.

Serta, gambar di facebook tu, jangan lah nak dedah sana dedah sini. Malu I. You pun tau kan, perempuan ni ibarat cokelat Ferrero Rocher. Bila berbalut dengan pembalut, even cokelat tu jatuh kelantai pun orang still nak. Tapi kalau dah tak berbalut, bila jatuh ke lantai, semua buat dono. Ada tu, kalau boleh, ada yang nak pijak lagi. You pun tak nak kena pijak kan?

Lagi pun, you tahu, tak ada lelaki di dunia ni yang nak kahwin dengan perempuan yang seksi meksi.

My future wife(s),

I tak tahu pasal masa depan I. I tak tahu berapa banyak duit yang I akan ada. So, dengan kata lain, I mungkin tak akan mampu kasi rumah 10 tingkat kat you. I juga mungkin tak mampu kasi you 10 emas intan berlian. Harap you tak kisah dengan diri I yang tak beharta ni. Tapi kalau setakat kasi you 20 hingga 30 anak tu, I okay je. Dalam tiga tahun, kita mungkin akan ada 2 anak. Tapi tu tak termasuk yang kembar tau.

Bila kita ada rumah nanti, I tak kisah kalau you nak bekerja. Tapi lagi bagus kalau you duduk je rumah jaga I. I bukan mintak di layan bagai raja. Tapi kalau I balik dari kerja tu, apa salahnya tanggalkan stokin I, urut bahu I, sediakan minum-minum I. Tapi kalau you tak nak buat, tak apa. I boleh tambah lagi 1 (cukup 2). Lagi pun, bila I tambah lagi 1, kurang la sikit beban you. See? I memang prihatin.

Hmm. You tau, I tak mengharapkan yang you adalah gadis lemah lembut dan ikut semua kata I. Kalau you boyish sikit pun apa salahnya. Aggressive itu menarik. Kalau boleh, lebihkan kat bahagian mengada-ngada dan keras kepala you tu. I suka. Senang la I nak ajak bergaduh kalau macam tu. Sebab kalau di ikutkan, I tak suka perempuan yang lemah lembut sangat. Nanti tak meriah rumah tangga. So kalau skali skala bergaduh, best juga kan? Lagi pun, kita gaduh siang-siang je, bila dah nampak katil di malam Jumaat, kita berbaik lah. Tambahan pula, bagi kita, setiap malam kan malam Jumaat.

My future wife (s),

You, I harap you reti memasak. You mesti reti memasak. Apa? Tak salah kalau perempuan tak reti masak? Ya. Memang tak salah. I tak kata pun salah. Tapi jangan salahkan I kalau I tambah lagi 1 isteri (cukup 3) sebab yang satu dan dua tak reti masak nak buat macam mana kan? Okay tak-tak. I tak nak bini 2,3,4. Banyak sangat. bukan tak mampu. Tapi... Ehem.

Actually, I bukan mintak you masak macam makan kat hotel. Asalkan you reti masak yang simple-simple sudah lah. You tau, air tangan masakan isteri lah yang buat si suami setia. Lagi pun, tak akan setiap hari kita nak makan kat restoran kan? Kalau setiap hari makan kat restoran, baik I kahwin je dengan mak cik tukang masak tu. Ye tak? You pun tak nak kan I tambah lagi satu (cukup 4) kan?

I harap you reti jaga diri sebelum jumpa I. Kalau boleh, jangan couple banyak-banyak. Tak pernah couple lagi bagus. Tapi kalau dah couple tu, jangan buat yang bukan-bukan dengan boyfriend you. Bila dating tu, jangan nak mengada-ngada keluar berdua. Boyfriend you tu bukan boleh percaya sangat. Kebanyakkanya adalah buaya. Sebab kalau dah lelaki, mesti bermulut manis. Boys, their mouth is bull****. So, don't trust them.

Akhir kata dari I, bila kita kahwin nanti, you masak, I makan. I imam, you makmum. I baca doa, you aminkan. You merajuk, I pujuk. Perfect, kan? So cepat lah cari I. I takut lah nak cari 'you'. Takut tersalah pilih perempuan lain. You pun mesti tak nak jadi isteri ke dua I kan.

THIS WAS COPIED FROM FB...

Sons'-day...

2011-04-10T10:56:00.002+08:00

the day where all sons' should enjoy...
a day when our moms can scream their lungs out to wake us up yet we don...
why...
because dad is still sleeping too...
muahahahah....
i wish....

oh well i'm stuck in Manjung still...
i've got 2 more days to my exam...
and...
i'm not prepared at ALL...
i/m not able to get that kick start to my study mood...
why cuz i'm just not able too...
huaaarghhh....

on another note...
it's already 11 am...
and...
i am the only one awake...
yikes...
just as i thought i wAs bad... the other boys are worst...
hua hua hua...

so my plans for today is....
to get my laundry done before balik KL...
gosok-gosok can send to the kakak dobi....
read on seizures.. thalasaemia... and re-run all the tbl slides...

well those are my plans...
now...
how do i execute them??/
huaarghh....???

yikes...
okies... gonna hit the shower...
errr...
later...

unproductive Saturday...

2011-04-09T19:10:00.002+08:00

and sooo...
my 4 weeks in Manjung is almost over....
today marks the end of the 3rd week here...
ok la... tomorrow Sunday la actually but what the heck...

so yes i've survived 3 weeks of Manjung life...
but of course i had to balik la one of the weekends...
muahahahah...
i was born in the city and brought up in the city...
so how do u expect me to survive outside the city...

alhamdulillah... its been a breeze...
not really la... but yea... i would say that time really flies...
i've had some good learning experience here...
some interesting cases seen and overtly friendly parents...
so friendly to the extend that they call me "doctor"...
well that is something to be proud off...
but i wont let myself get carried away by the title i've yet to received...
snap.. snap...
i've got 2 more years insyallah...
if all goes well and no hiccups along the way...
once done...
that is when i start a whole new chapter in life...
what it has in hold for me... only the Almighty knows... wa'allahualam...
for now... just pray its something desirable and leading to the path of His Mercy...

in terms pf planning for the future... yea...
i've got lots...
well to make it simple...
i have 2 major plans and i will only choose one of the two...

PLAN A...
is to proceed in the health sector...
work my way up in the government ranks in the Ministry of Health...
eventually and hopefully do 1 better then where my parents are now...
retire as a Senior Government Official or better still retire as the Director General of Ministry of Health... in doing that and whilst in position... make some policy changes in the Ministry in order to elevate Malaysia's health system as a whole...

on the other hand...

PLAN B...
is to leave the whole health setting in-directly and pursue my dreams of becoming a lawyer...
at times i think this is a totally crazy idea... but its logically possible to achieve...

well all those are just plans...
what ever it is...
my life has already been determined by Him...
which i nor does anyone knows...
all we could do is plan....
plan plan plan...
because failing to plan is planning to fail...
hahahaha....

on a different story...
i think i need a new suit...
yea... the blazer kind of suit...
the one i currently have is almost 3 years old and i think i'm growing out of it...
buncit edi laaaa,,,,

emotions...

2011-03-29T21:02:00.004+08:00

i'm not the right person to be writing about this...
however...
i'd like to say a few things...

firstly...
i say that i am not the right person is because...
i dunno what emotions is actually...
ya ya.. i can look it up in the dictionary bla bla bla...
well what ever it is...
i dunno what it actually means because i've lost part of it from within me...

sounds weird but yearghhh...
over the years...
i've been trying to learn ways to hide my emotions...
ways to control my emotions...
and every other thing that has got to do with emotions...

it is in my opinion that emotion is nothing but just a part of life that can bring u down...
it also plays a big role in affecting one's ability to think rationally...
thus it pretty much does carry a heavy weight of percentage in one's ability to perform optimally...
this may sound a lil in-human...
but hey its just my opinion...
not that i am able to master this ability yet...
but i sure do hope to get there some day...
well of course with intention of doing greater good rather than damage...

however...
there is that lil part of me which still hungers and and yearn to express my emotions...
but for now...
i'll try as hard as i can to hold them back...
cuz if i let it out unnecessarily it could mean world disaster... so yeah....

to my readers...
what i'd like to say here really is...
i dunno...
maybe...
what i am trying to say here is let not ur emotions conquer ur sanity...
cuz if u allow it to...
it would only kill u from the inside out....

trust and respect...

2011-03-28T18:03:00.003+08:00

trust and respect are synonymous...
not by the meaning per se...
but it usually comes hand in hand...
be it in business, medicine, our daily lives, friendship, relationship and etc..

well today i'm gonna pen my thoughts here on this particular issue...
or shall i say issues...
and with it i'd like to relate it closely to friendship and relationship...

what i'm about to blurt here are merely my 2 cents worth of thoughts...
nothing more then my own experience and opinion...

readers...
feel free to disagree...
if U r reading this... U may have heard me blabber it to U before...

now where should i start...
oh yes...
Bismillah...

trust...
by simple definition...
"reliance on and confidence in the truth, worth, reliability, etc, of a person"
i think enuf can be extracted from the definition itself...
the word itself is self-explanatory...

respect..
means....
"to show consideration for; treat courteously or kindly, to respect someone's rights."...
again the definition is self-explanatory...

thus i've pretty much have got nothing to say here do i??

“To be trusted is a greater complement than to be loved”.. George McDonald

"Love is unconditional, relationships are not".. ~ Grant Gudmundson

moooo....

2011-03-26T19:33:00.001+08:00

this post is dedicated to U...

Saturday...

2011-03-26T14:50:00.001+08:00

so time really does fly...
its Saturday already...
that means i've got another 3 weeks here...
i hope hope to fully benefit from it...
HOPE i said....
muahahahah....

on another note...
i'm actually at home on a Saturday...
well not really my own house la...
but yea...
surprisingly x keluar mana2 pongggg...
weee...
boleh masuk Guiness World Record nih...
muahahahaha....
well initially there were plans to go Pangkor laa...
Ipoh laaa,,,
but sleep got the better of me...
and when i sleep...
nothing can wake me up...
hahahah....
so yea... thats why i'm home actually....

in local news today...
i'm doing my CWU...
WTF... yea...
Me>>> SYAFIQ AZMAN....
dah start buta case write up....
hua hua hua....
start cepat abes cepat....
yearghhhh....

ok bye...

P/s: KinKong... i nak ice cream plis...

Thursday

2011-03-24T20:11:00.000+08:00

its Thursday already...
so fast...
but i wanna go back to Kl this week...

...

2011-03-23T21:18:00.000+08:00

i just wanna say...
cuckoo..
cuckoo..
i'm going cuckoo...

i dunno what to say....

2011-03-22T04:31:00.002+08:00

i am in Manjung now....
thats all...
i feel sad but i dunno why...
can somebody please listen me out...
i need to spill this but i dunno where to start...
oh...

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY AYAH...

warrgghhhh....

2011-03-18T17:59:00.001+08:00

i yang x tahan rupenye..
what is this??
its killing me inside out...
why...
why...
why...

i'm weak inside....

2011-03-17T13:27:00.002+08:00

i can take any challenge charging towards me...
i confidently think i can win too...
but...
when it comes to Girls...
i'm the weakest creature god has ever created...

life as it is...

2011-03-13T23:51:00.000+08:00

i cant take this any longer so i've gotta put it down onto paper cuz i can no longer hold it inside....

first and foremost...
what ever i am about to jot in this entry doesnt totally reflect me...
yup not totally but to a certain degree it does..

feelings...
everybody has feelings...
*lagu feelings in the background*

my name is *you know what*...
many know me as macm-macm la...

anyways to the point...
i've bee told lately by many that my appearance i portray a strong and confident person...
yes its true that i pretty much am confident of the things i do...
as for strength, physically i would say no.. :)
but in other terms like mental and emotionally i may be...
may be...

well here is the truth about me...
its been years that i've been like this...
it's taken years for me to be able to hide the true me from the world...

i was never like this...
the old me was a total opposite...
i was an approachable person...
happy...
jovial...
and always smiling...
somehow, this version got lost in time...

i am a more private person now...
prefer to be alone...
company is an option...
friends are just friends...
i do admit that i dislike this version of me...
and at times wonder where the old me has gone...

well i know where its hiding...
its still inside me somewhere...
to scared to come out...
thus hiding behind the person that i am...

where did it go wrong?
why have i turned to be the person that i am now?

i really have no answer to that...
but one thing for sure...
the biggest contributor is life...
yes life...
life as it is has turned me into the person that i am today...

is it good?
i really have no answer to that...
but if u do... leave me a comment...

no one knows me

2011-03-10T18:04:00.000+08:00

People tend to think they know me but the truth is they don't...
I've learnt and still learning to hide my feelings and emotion from others...
To me these two entity are the two most precious item in a persons life...
As for me... These are the two things I will learn to hide from the outside word...

My feelings are mine and mine alone...
Why do I need to share what I feel with others...
Who are they?
Not even my own parents do I divulge my feelings...
maybe I'm not ready...
But I do believe one day someone will unlock this reserved heart of mine...

Same goes to emotions...
Is it important for others to take note of my emotions?
Do anyone even bother?
If there are those out there that does..
Lemme know..

This is just me...
The true me...

I bother so much about others...
But I disallow others to bother about me...
Because...

It is just who I am...
The me inside of me...

There are times I wonder..
Why do I even bother care for others?
Because its just the person that I am...

subway

2011-03-08T23:47:00.001+08:00

once upon a nite...
i was hungry...
i texted for someone for company...
i got 2...
so we went makan subway....
the end...

depressing nite...

2011-03-07T01:06:00.002+08:00

i just came back from a stupid game...
MU lost yet again...
well i would say its typical of them to slip up in the last stretch of the season...
however though...
i still hope they win the title...
tonights game was a fluke...
they were without 2 senior centre back...
fergie playing scholes and carrick together is a no-no...
yet he has not realized that...

moving on...
two by-election took place today...
and BN won both seat...
way to go laa...

in other news...
apparently...
there is someone who actually reads this crap i have in this blog...
U know who U are....

neglected

2011-03-05T00:00:00.004+08:00

its been ages since i posted any entry into this blog of mine...
truly long while but i'm not able to justify why...
i had promised my readers (if there are any) that i would constantly update this web log...
i guess i've lied to them and myself...
forgive me...

reflecting back on the actual reason why i created this blog is...
1. as a space for me to spill all my thoughts and rambling that goes on in my head...
2. as a space for me to ventilate my feelings and anger...
3. a place where i can write nonsense without being told by anyone that this is nonsence...
and etc...

so yessssssss i will start to ramble and grumble again...
insyaAllah...

feeling glad out of the sadness from the past....

2010-07-26T03:31:00.002+08:00

i took a slow drive back from a friends house for dinner...
reminiscing on the past and predicting the future...

the drive made me more thankful of what The Lord has given me in the past...
or even made me go thru...
amongst them are my relationship issues...

big issue this one is...
BUT...
as time passes i am able to rationalize of the past...
and accept what has happened...

first off...
she may had been an ideal girl... BACK THEN...
but i am glad things never worked out...
it surprises me to be knowing her now to be a totally changed person...
attitude change, behavior and etc...
so yea...
i don't mind not even knowing her now...

the second...
made a great company...
got along so fine and it pretty much convinced me it could work out...
but again...
things didn't go as planned...
though much effort was put in place to make it work...
if fate is not on your side then it just falls to pieces...

last but not least...
the third...
hahhahhahhah...
none...
never had a third one...
though there was a perspective candidate...
it didn't get thru either...
i am glad though...

having gone thru all this shits of the past really scares me to step into the future...
i at times wonder whether there is anyone who has stopped changing...
you get the idea right...
the saying "people change..." till when are they gonna change??
now comes to mind the questions...

WHAT IF?
1=they change their attitude and become someone of an unpleasant attitude?
2=they say they love u today and 10years down the road say it to someone else?
3=...

another question which made me thought...
if The Almighty has made pairs for everyone on this earth...
how would i know the pair i am matched with or match myself with is meant for me...
what if my pair was supposed to be Jenn Aniston... -Pfft... stupid i know-
when will i ever be paired??
hahahahahah....
so much more to be asked and answered when it come to relationship...

as for the future...
i ought to think i would be happy as i am now...
though there are times when i do feel the need for company...
there are always your friends... yet its not the same as to having a significant other...

p.s ranjan & co

2010-07-02T09:14:00.002+08:00

so i've started my month long of elective program since yesterday...
it would take up most of my holidays...
but its ok cuz i think i might enjoy this thing tha i've chosen as my elective...

whats with the the title u may ask...
well that's the law firm that i am attached to...
yup..
u read that right...
A LAW FIRM...

this particular firm specializes 90% on medical cases...
who would have thought that only doctors know medicine eh?
this particular firm handles mostly medical related cases, be it civil or criminal case... this firm can handle it...

why law?
well, truth be told...
i had thought of becoming a lawyer not too long ago...
an officer of the courts and champion of the laws...
what happened along the way only He knows...
for He is the Almighty and Ever-knowing....

ok... thats all

half a year already

2010-06-24T08:58:00.002+08:00

its been that long since i last inked my thoughts on this page...
well i can justify that...
first of...
i had been busy with preparations for my first professional exams...
which, Alhamdulillah... i passed...
so yea pretty much took 3-quarters of my life...

secondly...
no other reason really...
hahaha...

anyways, blessing upon Him for my success in the recent exams...
now i am on holiday for a month ++...
wow i thought to myself at first...
but 3 days into the holidays i've already lost my sense of direction in life...
macam dah tak ade hala tuju hidupku...
bangun pukul 6 petang... tido 6 pagi... OMG...

that aside...
beginning the 1st of july 2010...
i officially begin third year with my elective course...
for this course, i hve choosen to learn about medical law in specific and the malaysian legal system in general...
so i shall be a lawyers assistant for the next one month...
i might i have to do donkey jobs... so what??
the feeling of being in a law firm (not for any wrong-doings) gives me good jibes...
so yea what the heck...

i shall keep this blog posted on my daily routines InsyaAllah...

HYPOCRITES

2009-12-15T00:26:00.000+08:00

u are 1...
i am 1...
and so is every 1...

1 MALAYSIA!!!

frustration looms

2009-11-29T20:20:00.002+08:00

as finals for NS awaits me this friday...
i sit here in front of my screen reminiscing in my mind of my own personal frustrations...
what is there to be frustrated about??
we'll... everything ... simple isn't it??
no its not that i am not thankful for all that i got...
i am... but i just feel enough is enough...

i need to re-shape myself, my character me as whole...
i think i've been tread on for far toooooo long...
i will no longer want that to happen..
putting others needs above my own...
and putting others first in all aspects before myself...

i've had it...
i think i am gonna be like those stuck up idiots who only care for themselves...
call me idiot for all u like...
i'd like to feel what its like to live in my own world...
disregarding all that the world has to say.. just moving on and doing things as i like....
i am onli changing to better my own self needs...

selfish....
i know it does sound very selfish@self centered...

so what am i to do???

owh... damn u bloody shit feelings...
i so dislike u...

i wish i had noo feelings for anything...
maybe that way i can be happy...

played like a fool...

2009-11-09T01:30:00.002+08:00

i am the fool...
hahahaha...
i got myself into shit...
HOLY deep shit..
not the first time tho'...
but i really dunno how to get out of it this time... haihz...

took a ride that went round and round and round...
ending up nowhere...
pffffttttt.......

500 days of summer

2009-11-08T15:36:00.002+08:00

as most may already its a movie... DUH!!!
so yea...
all i wanna say is that...
the movie really means a lot to me...
why..
cuz it pretty much reflects me...
the past...
and THE PRESENT...

burying the hatchet

2009-10-23T19:23:00.003+08:00

as many may notice of the latest political hoohaa involving 2 political party of our country..
i'd like to jot down my opinion here regarding the on going hoohaa...

first off...
2 political figures who were once enemies have buried the hatchet...
now that is something that we done see everyday...
is this an honest truce and for their on political convenience?
or is temporary pact to fight the so called 3rd force amongst them?
it could also be just superficial that they shake hands in front of the press yet the bickering continues behind the scene...
who's to know??
in my opinion... the deserved leader is an honest man... yet he, as he himself claimed that he was back stabbed by his own men... i do believe his words... since his election he has promoted transparency and practiced honesty without favoring anyone regardless...
again this is politics... a world where anything can happen...
i literally mean anything...
so will they be able to solve their internal conflict??
or will ROS investigation outcome makes it otherwise??
lets just wait and see...
i sure do hope the outcome is something favorable...
cuz should it not...
the "war" within the party may prolong...

maybe until even when i take over... heheheh
now that's gonna my challenge in the future...

ELSEWHERE...
appointing and outsider to lead...
this news is the dumbest i have heard...
oh well i cant really say that cuz another political party is practicing it too..
but this is even more ridiculous because ridiculous because the appointed leader is all the way from across the the sea from another state...
i hope u understand what i am trying to say...
ok ok... i give u clue lah...
SABAH...
enough said...
the action taken by the de facto leader, in my opinion is a rather stupid one...
its like ur sending a baboon to correct the mistakes of a chimpanzee...
i'm sure the chimpanzees are smart enough to sort out their own troubles...
need they the help of a baboon??
i am so totally against them i am sorry...
yet i thank them for their existence to keep the government on their toes...
haihz...
whats to happen to malaysia man??
o'ALLAH...
give these people some guidance...

i've actually got more to ramble and criticize on them...
but since my stomach sudah bising i'd rather not....
next time maybe...
ciaoz...
thank you for reading my blog:
naveen kabilan and yan chyi...
wakakakakak

friendship

2009-10-07T23:36:00.003+08:00

I was reading a a blog the other day regarding friendship...
I must say i was touched...
But then i asked myself...
How many of us cherish the friendship we have with our colleagues, friends, pal or whatever u call it?
What is it?
What does it mean?

Do i cherish and appreciate my friends?
Do my friends appreciate me?
If they do, how much?
Are all these questions relevent?
Are all the appreciation important to show how much your friend appreciate you?

To my friends who are reading this...
I'm sorry i cant write a testimonial on each and everyone of you...
But i wanna u all to know, that for u all to accept me as a friend is something i appreciate very much!!!
Very much...
And no words can explain my gratitude appreciation towards u all..

raya...

2009-09-27T14:13:00.004+08:00

antara design2 ang-pau raya tahun nih...

dari semuae bank dan comapny yang ade...

aku rasa inilah design ang-pau yang paling menyerlah...

oleh KEMENTERIAN KESIHATAN MALAYSIA...

update pasal raye nanti eh

what if...

2009-09-23T20:55:00.001+08:00

what if...

one day when someone u care for...

lies to you...

and leave you...

would you be happy or sad???

the fact that the person has come to ur life...

the person has made me happy...

i'd be thankful...

for having met that person...

for fate is charted by us...

it's HE who writes our destiny...

something the LORD needs...

2009-09-17T21:32:00.001+08:00

the LORD needs a LADY....
to be by his side thru ups and downs...
thru sorrow and cheers...

it's true...
the LORD needs a LADY to be by his side...

sometimes

2009-09-16T20:39:00.003+08:00

HE gave us the sun to shine our day...
but HE can take it away...
replacing it with rain and storm...
wondering where it has gone...
only to find a bright colourful rainbow...

lain daripada yang lain...

2009-09-14T21:24:00.003+08:00

dia...

dia tuh lain...

lain daripada yang lain...

dia bijak...

dia berprinsip...

dia beragama...

dia..

tidak pernah ku kenali...

tidak pernah ku temui...

namun ada sesuatu yang ku kagumi...

dia...

prof rasheeeeeeeddddd.......

2009-09-14T12:19:00.002+08:00

some quotes from todays class...

" you all are a bunch of walking embolus..."

"pagi tadi tak minum annmum ke?..."

"full blood count... untuk kira level budu and chincalok dalam darah..."

"telinga kamu berdesing sebab malaikat balling pen dekat telinga kamu..."

sushi... yuuummmmssss....

2009-09-13T16:38:00.007+08:00

fridays are really killing me i tell you!!!

why you may ask...

hmmm...

its not only because of the weekly assesment...

but also this...

eating sessions...

makan besar...

hahahaha...

dengan orang yang besar...

well actually best jugak la...

the past 3 fridays or so i've been digging my pocket deep to satisfy my hunger...

its not always that i do this...

only when i'm under alot of pressure or stress...

so in this case would be stress la kot...

i've been going to this particular place 2 weeks straight now...

with these 2 loyalist of mine who would ever willingly teman me makan...

hahahah...

who are they??first off... POJI....

siket siket siket... his favourite quote to pow makanan orang...

next off... FARID...
the prodigal son...
hahahaha..
why?
dunno... simply say...

poji diligently cooling his noodle...

some chicken thingy he ate...

i wasn't fast enough to taste abit...

he finished it first...

amongst my favourite..

unagi jo... and tamago unagi...

yum yum itell you....

farids side dish: unagi tofu...

damn this is good tooo...

the tofu just melts away in your mouth...

some seafood noodle i had...

not bad too...

rather then the typical hot dons'... i tried this thingy...

the usual green tea and watermelon juice for farid..

and coke for me with a slice of lemon with it...

to make it less gassy...

the apeks in the kitchen..
a big thank you to them...
hahahahah...
oooo....
there was one hot waitress serving us...
lupe amik gambar la...

i guess who ever reads this must be wondering where the heck is this place...
well i tell you.. to date this is my fave sushi place...
thanks to Caryn and Liang Zhi...

SUSHI ZANMAI....

sunway pyramid...

they have one in the gardens and one utama too...

do try it...

and tell me me of ur opinion..

price??

hmmmm standard macm sushi king gak lah...

but much nicer sushi's...

next up must try is ..

tenji sushi and sashake sushi....

masjid besi by the shores of putrjaya lake...

2009-09-13T15:53:00.005+08:00

last week i had the oppotunity to perform my tarawih at the masjid besi...

the mosque is also known as masjid tuanku mizan zainal abidin....

named after our current yand di-pertuan agung...

the sultan of terengganu...

so here are some images i managed to snap of the mosque...

i must say... i was impressed...

definately was...

comparing his mosque to the putrajaya mosque up the road...

this mosque is better lited...

and the carpet was golek-able...

heheheh...

the entrance

along the walkway to the entrance they had these caligraphy...
am not sure what they mean...
possibly the asmaul husna...

the inside after 8 rakaat of tarawih

the outside

the front of the mosque

more caligraphy

the end...

as the final passes by

2009-09-07T22:37:00.003+08:00

so on the eve of every finals that is how my study table would look like...

well most of the time its that way..

yeap if u can see in detail...

its facebook on one screen and slides on the other...

i guess that is why i am not doing well...

oh well.. life goes on...

i've been feeling unblessed lately...

with series of unfortunate events occurring to myself..

at times i wonder if HE even listens to my prayers??

don get me wrong now...

i've not lost faith in HIM..

NO NO NO...

i'd be mad if i was...

BUT...

i am...

loosing faith in myself...

am i worthy of being here today?

am i worthy being who i am today?

am i worthy doing he things i do today?

i'm loosing my own morale confidence...

in every aspect...

i never was like this...

this just ain't me...

where did it all go wrong??

where was the turning that i mistook...

tell me...

as time flies

2009-08-23T16:48:00.006+08:00

as time flies,
confusion looms the mind,
its not the truth,
its not the thoughts,
nor was it the tick of the clock..

as time flies,
everything changes,
be it life or lives,
the world is constantly changing,
i may be who i am,
but it does not stop me from changing,
at least for the betterment from who i am,
then change me from who i am..

no one is denying ones wishes,
no one is denying ones selfishness,
all one is asking is for a try,
to make one a better person by being with thee..

here lies a plain white sheet of cloth,
waiting eagerly to be drawn upon,
why so eager?
only HE knows...

along came a stranger,
filled with colours of joy,
walking by the cloth filling it full with joy,

now the stranger is gone,
there'll be no more joy,

though it was just a spark,
its not the end,
please don loose the spark...
with hope it'll light in the end

as the year begins

2009-08-15T23:30:00.002+08:00

its been a week since year 2 of my medical studies began...
alhamdulillah for this day to happen...
but not so alhamdulillah for starting it on the wrong foot...
new year, new obstacles, new problems same person...

first off..
respiratory system block...
anatomy classes this time round is with a new lecturer, AsscProf Dr Khin...
nice lady but extremely loud...
i still miss Prof Nasar though!!!
huhuhuhu...
nope not complaining...
hope to buck up soon and shift my gear faster as at the end of this year i'd be having my Pro's... Insyallah...

secondly..
H1N1 is really worrying me...
as i fall under the high risk category cuz i am asthmatic...
though i've not had a serious attack in over a year i am still cautious about it...

thirdlly...
the college has gone nuts...
nuts to the core of it...
why u may ask??
firstly... i am feeling that the students of the college are being used as lab specimens for some genius people to conduct a RM100K research on affective domain...
i am not saying its not a noble thing to do...
but it is in my opinion that we the students are the one who suffers...
first of all...
i don't think think the college as whole is steady enough to be standing on its own...
with everyone having their own agenda and no unity amongst the BIG people... have they ever considered or even thought of the consequences of their actions???
"NURTURING THE PASSION TO CARE"
"lu pikirlah lah sendiri wahai pembaca..."

secondly...
affective domain related still??
what are the objectives of the college??
to produce MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS...
yet their actions speaks otherwise!!!
what do i mean by this...
their implementing this new system which is similar to the NILAM project which we had to go thru during our schooling days...
again i tell u...
their going nuts!!
MAD...

thirdly...
DEMERIT SYSTEM...
yup... ur reading it rite i tell u...
i must say... the coordinators are so free to be judging everyone!!!
peer assesments.. pooop!!

sometime i feel they should change their motto...
from "nurturing the passion to care"
to " nurturing hypocrites of the future"

in other news....
Mom re-did the garden...
gave it a face lift la...
pics on the garden... nanti la eh..

sometimes some things are better left unsaid....

2009-07-27T21:03:00.003+08:00

maybe it's true...
the above saying...
be it a lie or the real truth..

some things are better left unsaid..
at least for my part i know that now..
maybe the act of telling the truth was the wrong turn i took in this journey of mine..

regrets??
maybe a lil' on my part of the act..
but to have started or have had a companionship never would i regret..
selfishly thinking the attraction had grown to become an fondness..
maybe it was wrong of me to do so..

or was it the act of rushing?
i never rushed thou into anything..
only the act of pledging one's devotion to thou was all that was said..
and discreetly hoping for affection..

keep hoping is all i will wait for......

of telling the truth and being honest

2009-07-21T23:04:00.006+08:00

"honesty is the best policy.."

ever heard of the above saying
i'm sure u have..
some private companies motto or something..
the MACC ke..
somewhere lah..
paling tak pun..
mak u penah cakap..
"tipu dosa.." or "kalu tipu nanti hidung panjang macam pinochio..."
something like that lah..
penah tak?

its true that being honest is a good thing..
yet at times it can bring bad omen to one..

for instance..
in a a marriage..
a husband accidentally got drunk and had a mishap with another lady...
wanting to be honest and truthful, hubby confesses to wife with clear conscience and saying sorry it was a mistake...
only finding to be greeted with an annulment document for breakfast..

another example..
friendship between a boy and a girl..
the girl, wanting to be honest to the guy confessing her real feelings and hope for the guy..
the outcome??
the girl being given the cold shoulder treatment and treated as if they never knew one another, whereas prior to the confession they were "like" best of friends...
the questions are:
-why the sudden change?
-is she ugly or not to his standard?
-is he scared of commitment?

the point is, why the sudden change..
why cant he just be truthful?
is it fair to be leaving the girl pondering where it all went wrong?
or
was it a mistake for her to confess to him?
...

my question to you is...
is honesty really the best policy in the situations above??
is it worth telling the truth and being honest only ending up hurting and getting yourself distraught??

O' someone,
do tell me,
where did it all go wrong?
why the sudden change?

of telling the truth and being honest

2009-07-21T23:04:00.003+08:00

-CONTENT SOON TO BE UPLOADED-

ramblings

2009-07-19T17:00:00.002+08:00

it's been a while since i actually wrote anything on this site...
apart from the last quote posting..
it's been a month long..

so here are some updates...
where i've been and why i've been neglecting my blog...
first and foremost...
the past month or so i've been busy with my short semester...
alahamdulillah.. it ended last week..
of the 3 papers i sat for i've cleared 2.. with one still pending-viva...
do pray for my success readers...

also the out the month..
i was entangled with an orientation program..
it was for the new foundation students...
nothing much to ramble there..
just another alhamdulillah for its success and thank you to the volunteers...

apart from college issues...
my mind has been boggling and playing with me...
i really cant put into words or maybe i dunno how to put them into words...
its not much or really a problem..
more like inner-self conflict..
its getting me really confused and making more white hairs grow on my head...
buhoo!!!!
maybe i am really loosing it this time...
loosing my mind...
hahahaha...

in other news...
some happy things have been happening to the people around me...
particularly to Farid... congratulations is all i can say...
really am happy for u... hope things work well for u...
its as good as sealed!!!~

i wonder when that would ever happen to me..
hmmm... still praying!!!

-to be continued-

random quote

2009-07-12T10:10:00.002+08:00

"tears are meant to flow just as hearts are meant to be broken..."

could it be... they've lost their mind...

2009-06-17T09:22:00.002+08:00

warning; U... may find this posting boring.. but i just had to do it... ;)

let me start with a quote i read in todays paper...

MINISTER : ".... PUBLIC FED UP WITH OPPOSITION MPs ANTICS..."

Opp MP: "... SHOULDN'T HAVE STOOPED SO LOW.."

sedar pun mereka rupa-rupanya!!!!!

more fiascoes..
nonsense...
sheer nonsense...
many time i've said it... if not in this blog... i would have verbally said it to friends, family or people close me...
THE OPPOSITION ARE WASTING THE PEOPLES TIME...
yet they dare call themselves representatives of the RAKYAT...
i for goodness sake am a RAKYAT..
ur suppose to be representing me... to be my voice..
yet ur clowning around in the august house...
NONSENSE...
first and foremost...
i must admit the last general election was a real screw up...
for that i onli have one faction to blame...
but the people too are to blame... for their unwise decision...
i'd really like to curse those who elected the MP representing the area i stay...
well i can only curse because i was too young to elect in the last general election...
my question to the people sharing@living in the same constituency as i do...
1.do you know who u elected to represent u in the parliament?
2.have u ever seen him before or heard of him??
3.what qualities or experience does he have in malaysian politics??
4.have we seen him around in the area lately??

ah... screw it... u get the idea what i am trying to say here...
before that let me answer the questions i've just posted in the above to u...
1.yes... i know him as the secret camcorder guy...
2.never!!! onli got to know about him in the news for "some wrong doing"
3.experience... i think NIL.. NONE.. ZERO... i think i am better then him... i am serious...
he's hardly in malaysia.. or WAS hardly in malaysia... running HIS business elsewhere... then out of the blue... BOOOM... UNDILAH SAYA...
poops!!!!!!!!!!!
4. A TOTAL NO!!! dulu, before election sibuk ade kat malaysia nih lepas tuh... HAMPEH!!!

oh well...
from a LAYMEN point of view...
a certain political figure USED "FAMOUS" ppl just to garner cheap support and publicity in the last election...
like the "camera" guy or the ISA man...
look at him now...
sitting in parliament smiling devilishly when his fellow colleagues behave like monkeys...
what has he done or any of his running mates of HIS party done in this one year..???
NOTHING ..
oh well something if u consider all the CHEAP TACTICS like by-elections...
MPs crossing over... now thats another story to tell...
and more nonsese...
of lately... shouting slogans in the AUGUST HOUSE...
what did he do??
sit and smile... did he??
as the chief a paricular BLOC... though he may not be the WHIP..
control your team la...
thats why ur choosen to be LEADER!!!

HAH... PENAT DAN BORING LA.......

common MPs...
wake up and grow up!!!
i am serious here...
cukup la...
treat the parliament with respect...
jangan jadi macam INDIA AND TAIWAN....
DEBATE professionally like a learned civilised man...
serve the people... after all, ur allowances are from the peoples taxes...
yet u dare say the GOVERNMENT are wasting peoples money...
what are u doing??
PUTTING UP A CIRCUS SHOW IN PARLIAMENT!!
DAH LA TUH... TOLONG LA...

haihz...
enough rantings for now...
until the next time.... ciaoz....

1 year on...

2009-06-15T22:18:00.002+08:00

alhamdulilla praise to ALLAH that i've finished my first year in Mad-School
though it was not smooth sailing thru out the year with many dugaan along the way...
i'm glad i lasted... not Mad yet... just a Mad-ical student...
with short sem to follow- thats why i said it wasnt smooth sailing...
i'm glad one year has passed...
much to learn from it... hope to not repeat my mistakes in the coming year a learn to be more consistent....

so we ended the year with a batch dinner... more pics on my facebook... nothing here
the following day we had dinner@bbq at Prof H's house to mark the end of our year 1...
amongst those attended the bbq was...
-team m03
-group 2
- and some girls who are renting from prof next year...
so that evening we had so much food... sorry no photos... terlupe bawak camera... cume ade this few shots i took with my phone jer...
the menu for the evening was:
- bbq chicken marinated by Umi-Prof nye Bini... mmg sedap!!!
-pasta...
-potato salad
-tonnes of deliciously fattening dessert all prepapred by Umi
-and sate brought by prof NoorAini- ade ah dalam 2000 lebih cucuk...
(i know U are reading this... i only had 10 cucuk k... but lots of chiken and sweet dessrts)

ok here are some pictures of prof h's kitten...
they're bloody cute and look so enticing that ifeel like bitine their heads off...
so while playing with it we did some crazy things to it too...
like this one below:
Puss in a Crocs
strangled kitten... thats about it really... we left around 11 pm that night...

moving on...
the next day i went to Morib for my Moms Dept Family Day..
her last one apparently...
she has been told to transfer to HKL after working her ASS off to set up the Dept Of Psychiatry in Selayang Hospital over the last 10 years with many achievement to her credit....
pity her....
thats pretty much it really for saturday...

then on sunday, we left Morib and straight away went my dad punye aunts house...
my Kampung la...
rite in the heart of town...
Jalan Ipoh, KUALA LUMPUR...
yes... my kampung hahahah
we were there for my cousin punye anak punye cukur jambul...
senang cakap my anak sedara la...
so allow me to intro u to my nephew....

AIMAN... aka RYAN
sangat mengeramkan...
pipinye yang boyot... dan air liur nye yg sentiasa meleleh...
hahahah....

moving on again..
today i chaired a meeting at college for the july oreintaation progamme..
it didnt take long alhamdulillah....
1 jam lebey skit je...
i hope the dept head got what their supposed to do...
after that was the fun part...
jeng jeng jeng...
cyberjaya has this new joy ride...
well atleast i find it joyful..
hahahah
yea...
i took my maiden ride in the stunt drivers car...
hahahaha...
well.... for short distance...
it was worth while considering i got a cake after that...
eheheheh...

of 10 i'd rate the ride as 5...
the driver can have my trust to drive me around next time...
i have enough confidence... bole la put my life in the drivers hands..;)
hahahah

ok la...
cukup la tuh...
nanti pikir ape lagi nak tulis...
for now...
i'm gonna start writting my shopping list or update from my things to get in 2009 and plan something with the boys...

U... abes exam.. nanti laen plan plak k...
study smart....

dah la tu... posting da abes dah ni...
gi study k...
hahahahah

battlefield

2009-05-28T20:18:00.002+08:00

Don't try to explain your mind
I know what's happening here
One minute it's love
And suddenly it's like a battlefield

One word turns into a war
Why is it the smallest things that tear us down
My world's nothing when you don't
I'm not here without a shield
Can't go back now

Both hands tied behind my back with nothing
Oh no, these times when we climb so fast to fall again
Why we gotta fall for it now

I never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for
Why does love always feel like a battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield? (x2)
Why does love always feel like..

Can't swallow our pride,
Neither of us wanna raise that flag, mhmm
If we can't surrender then we both gonna lose what we had, oh no

Both hands tied behind my back with nothing
Oh no, these times when we climb so fast to fall again
I don't wanna fall for it now

I never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for
Why does love always feel like a battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield? (x2)

I guess you better go and get your armor, (get your armor) get your armor
I guess you better go and get your armor, (get your armor) get your armor
I guess you better go and get your...

We could pretend that we are friends tonight (oh-oh-oh)
And in the morning we'll wake up and we'll be alright
Cause baby we don't have to fight
And I don't want this love to feel like..

A battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield,
Why does love always feel like a battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield

I guess you better go and get your armor...

I never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for (fighting, fighting for)
Why does love always feel like a battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield? (x2)

I guess you better go and get your armor, (get your armor) get your armor
I guess you better go and get your armor, (get your armor) get your armor

Why does love always feel like...
Why does love always feel like...
A battlefield, a battlefield..

I never meant
to start a war
Don't even know
What we're fighting for

I never meant
to start a war
Don't even know
What we're fighting for

KAK LONG..
I'D LIKE TO DEDICATE THIS SONG TO U...
I KNOW U'RE GOING THRU SOME SHITS..
U'LL WIN THE BATTLE!!!

double post!!! from org yang malas

2009-05-19T11:42:00.005+08:00

ok so the pictures below are pictures of the cookies i baked...
it didn't turn out too bad actually..
what i thought was suppose to be normal cookies was actually soft cookies...
Miss C, am i rite? soft cookies??
not lemau for sure or masuk angin..
anyways...
i tried baking them or baked them 1 week ago...
it was on a sunday after mothers day celebration..
everyone got home and passed out after pigging out during hi-tea...
but yours trully didn't... i came home and started turning the kitchen into the war zone...
all my mom had to say was... "... FIQ, dont burn my kitchen ok.."
true enough i didn't.. :)
it was about 4 something when i started the ruckus in the kitchen...
my maid dah geleng kepala... thinking i am going to mess up the kitchen...
so i took out the recipe that Jo gave..
i diligently followed step by step and measured the eveything carefully with a lil' of modification here and there...
so here u are... :
the batter..
it looks abit like cat shit i admit but taste super-duper good...

on the tray before it goes into the oven
halfway baking...
see it does look like flatten cat-poop...
or melted cat-poop...
and the final product...
i must say i am proud of myself...
i can bake cookies now...
it taste good too...
anywho...
those who passed out just now... woke up to the smell of the cookies...
the minute the first tray come out, my youngest bro syabil officiated it...
hahahah...
ok enough of cookies story...

lets move on...
another cookies story...
but with regards to Miss C...

happy birthday to myself!!
i am officially legal..
i am 21.. yess...
the big two-one...

Alhamdulillah is the first and foremost thing due here...
thanks to HIM i am able to celebrate this day...
and all the thank you's to the people who wished and celebrated my birthday..

thank you to mak and ayah..
i know u guys don read my blog...
but to those who does..
see... i appreciate my parents ok!!!

next..
to my batch mates...
thank you for the wonderful surprise.. in Dungun...
i got myself partly buried and had flour and sand thrown at...
no pics here.. :(
hope to have it on facebook...
and guys... i am waiting for my sunglasses replacement ok!!!

last but not least...
Miss C...
thank you for hanging over the phone on the eve of my birthday...
thus, delaying my birthday present from the guys...
and being the first to wish me HAPPY BIRTHDAY...
thank you for the company and dessert last night...
the cupcakes is super-duper sweet...
i liked it... i think i finished a quarter after that...
and for the present...
now i think i can start something new... writting to U.. ;)

so here you go... the gambar below are the cupcakes Miss C got for me...
nampak dah rompong tu maksudnye dah slamat la!!!

MISS C: THANK YOU ONCE AGAIN FOR EVERYHTING MOST OF ALL THE COMPANY...

political fiasco on the rise??

2009-05-09T23:54:00.002+08:00

has anyone read the papers lately?
FREE ISA DETAINEE.. lucky fella Najib released him..
ZOO IN THE PERAK DUN...

so first thing first...
i've been reading in the papers in the last few days that someones wife has been going around in replacement of the husband to discharge his duty on his behalf.. well done to that.. but she said she is not able to serve her husbands constituents to best best level..
ok enough of that...
what ia mtrying to say here is..
people, be wise when electing your WAKIL RAKYAT...
CHOOSE WISELY...
don follow your emotions too much...
the morale here is, if he wasnt released...
he would have resigned thus a by-election would be needed...
elections= peoples tax money and time!!!
u get what i mean...
yet u ppl complain the governnment of today waste publics money...
u want new government...
see now their not even the government yet their already wasting money??
pikirlah sendiri wahai pembaca...

next...
has the reps in perak lost their mind??
i've seen indian parliament throw chairs...
taiwan throwrin punches and books and foul language across the august hall..
but then i thot to myself..
what the heck their uncivilized ppl..
but yesterday it happened in my very own country...
haihz...
it wasnt the parlaiment but the DEWAN UNDANGAN NEGERI.
HMMM...
banyaak aku nak kutuk nih tapi takot la...
kena tangkap or masuk court plak....
anyways...
what i wanna say is...
dah kalah tu kalah je la...
org sendiri pon x percaye dekat kamu...
ape nak buat...
sultan lagi la...
die bukan calang2 sultan..
he was a former lawyer, judge. lord president...
if he doesnt want u means xnak la...
ni masuk dewan gadoh2 macam budak tadika...
lepas tuh rosak kan harta benda dewan...
duit rakyat gak tu...

ok la cukup la for now...
i just feel upset with this kind of ppl...
grow up!!!
u r our leaders!!! be it G or O...
set the rite example...
forgive me for this boring posting..

list of thing to do

2009-05-05T00:38:00.002+08:00

after exam i shall...
1. balik rumah pj tido kao-kao
2. tawaf one utama macam buat umrah
3. tengok movie yang belom ditengok
4. survey phone baru
5. beli perfume sebab dah habis
6. masak cookie-- cuba

tapi sebelum tuh...
mohd syafiq azman...
exam finals jumaat ni!!!!

of C, COOKIES and ALINA... hmmm

2009-05-03T13:24:00.004+08:00

i was over at Jo's the other day to have dinner with him and a bunch of his friends...
he called all of us together as he was leaving back to US the next day...
actually monday, he was going to singapore first transit for a few days and meet up with JAZZDAMAN before going off...
so back to the dinner story...
we had some pizza, meat loaf, mash potatoes, and risottos...
surprisingly Jo cooked all of them all of them..
they're are his recipes he learnt and tried during his 8 months tenure in the states...
so credit goes to jo mostly and jesh for helping him and me too...
so i've learnt how to bake cookies now...
i love COOKIES...
YUMMM...
the above pic is the mixture...
C, if u're reading this...
it's not a premix...
its freshly mixed-if there is such a thing...
and the below is the first attempt...

check it out it's partly carcinogenic...
not our fault...
jo set the oven wrong....
but the products that came after this was much better and taste good too...
thanks to Jo's mom for telling him to correct the oven setting... ;)
and after my final and time to come i shall be baking it myself...
if it works out nicely i'll share it with everyone...
but if otherwise...
C, U dare try it or not?? hahahah

meet ALINA AZLAN...
me new girlfriend...
after being dumped by her sister ALYA AZLAN...
so yea...
my new buah hati ALINA :)

see don't we look great together...

hahahah...

k la... enough crap...

she is my cousin... ;)

but... but...

ALINA is still my DEAR...

C, were u chomel like this??

C=chomel.. ;)

REMINDER TO SELF: FRIDAY IS FINALS AND I AM DOING THIS SHIT...

of looks, attraction and love

2009-04-26T01:50:00.002+08:00

so how important is someones looks??
well in most cases i believe it is important especially when it comes to professional matters regarding careers and what not...
i've learn something from DrS... first impression last..
so wen u meet someone new look good so after that if u look selekeh pon xpe...
that would me my literal translation of DrS punye quote...

ok then there is this other quote..
or if U are reading this... someone punye principles..
DRESS TO IMPRESS..
i know it sounds super-duper vein...
but humans are very superficially judgmental..
no??
but if anyone is able to see U beyond that...
that means something...

LOVE...
what is it??

it is finally gone

2009-04-21T22:10:00.002+08:00

11 freaking long years of treatment and it's finally off..
i officialy am no longer a braces nerd anymore..
well not really nerd la.. but yea..
ok...
on record i had the permanent braces for 5.5 years...
yeap... thats how long i've had it on..
all this while i thot onli for 3 plus2 years but when the dr told me...
damn was i shocked...
prior to that i had a removable appliance before fixing the permanent one...
oh well...
just another stage in my life which is long over due...
now i can walk pass metal detectors undetected...
hahahah
now i don have to make the trip to Klang that frequent anymore...
but then i feel like i've lost something of me...
anywho..
my mouth feels lighter...
makan burger and steak lepas ni takde sekat2 lagi...
i know yucks...
hahaha...
oh well life goes on...
alhamdulilllah..
i know have straight teeth...
no more jongang like Mr Os...
thank you Dr...
and...
of course... thank you God... as all good things are from him...

close to a month since the last update...

2009-04-18T00:29:00.003+08:00

yes not a month yet...
hahaha...
i've got lots to write actually...
really...
from political issues, academic and private personal issues...
soon to come...
insyallah...

i've lost it

2009-03-25T14:05:00.001+08:00

i'm gone...
KAPUTS...
POOOFF...
SWOOSH...

i'm to young to be having midlife crisis...
i wanna live older then 42 please GOD...
so Jeen... bad diagnosis...
i dunno whats wrong with me too...
in my opinion...
the prognosis: bad

something is wrong with me

2009-03-23T04:51:00.002+08:00

i've not been able to sleep at hnite this pass week or two...
i'm not lying... though i spend a whole dah at college i just don feel tired at nite...
my body has gone PHYSIOLOGICALLY wrong...
my mind is MENTALLY kaputs...
i need help...
really i do...
but i just cant speak out...
i don't think anyine believes me...
just look at the time of this posting...

oh god help me...

aarggh

2009-03-22T16:44:00.002+08:00

i am loosing it...
i am..
why?
i dunno why..

the view from the 86th floor of klcc tower 1 looks great

why?

2009-03-03T00:28:00.003+08:00

i've not been myself this past few dayS..

at least thats what i've been feeling..

i feel that everything is worthless..

i really dunno what has gotten into me..

could be studies?

could it be life?

maybe it's just me..

i feel the world is rejecting me..

i feel myself rejecting me...

why?

i hate this feeling..

it's eating me from the inside!!

where did i go wrong?

what have i done wrong?

tell me life..

tell me world..

what is it that u have against me?

is it u?

maybe it's u?

no, u?

aargh...

FUCK LIFE!!!

only now i understand... kal ho naa ho

2009-02-19T01:03:00.000+08:00

Life changes its beauty all the time

Sometimes it's a shade, sometimes life is sunlight

Live every moment here to your heart's content

The time that is here may not be tomorrow

One who loves you whole-heartedly

It is difficult meet that person

If there is someone like that somewhere

That person is more beautiful than all

Grab onto that (person's) hand

He or she may not be so gracious tomorrow

Live every moment here to your heart's content

The time that is here may not be tomorrow

Taking the shadow of your eyelashes, when someone comes near

You try to reason with your crazy heart

Your heart just goes on beating

But think, that which is here now

That story may not be here tomorrow

Life changes its beauty all the time

Sometimes it's a shade, sometimes life is sunlight

Live every moment here to your heart's content

The time that is here may not be tomorrow

negara kanak-kanak kecil bermain api

2009-02-09T23:05:00.006+08:00

duli yang maha mulia king khairil hakim

menteri pertahanan: "rentap" farid
menteri penerangan dan pemakan-nan: pojie

pengerusi MIC Negara Kanak-kanak Kecil Bermain Api: "Macha" Al-Syafiqq

bendahara kanan King: Acaap Bugdet Handsome

dedicated to my fellow penguins

2009-01-30T22:53:00.003+08:00

biscuits by mcvitie's dedicated to myself... i've not had them in over 10 years... i last had them back in UK... 1 small peice cost rm 1.50 here damn... but it sure is nice... and yes the background picture is haley james scott... don't ask why... hahahaha... i am addicted to one tree hill... no i'm not gay... it's just a good show..

if...

2009-01-23T19:52:00.002+08:00

read the title carefully...

it states IF...

if i were to get married, i wanna wife who;

-is lawyer

-maybe a is doctor

-a doctor lawyer would be great...

if i were to have a child, i wanna;

-son

-maybe a daughter

-one of each would be good...

- the child must be likE JAMIE LUCAS SCOTT

I REMIND U AGAIN... IF...

I wanna know the answer....

2009-01-13T00:00:00.002+08:00

I never knew that you would be the one

to come along and snatch my heart and run

Away from me with no explanation why

I never knew what we had would die

All I wanna do is hide away

From all the hurt and pain of yesterday

Can't you see the tears, the hurt inside

I never knew, please tell me why??

Oh why did our love have to go away?

I don't know how, I don't know when

All I know is I'll never love this way again!!

All I wanna do is hide away

From all the hurt and pain of yesterday....

-i never knew-

-deborah cox-

if u are reading this, please answer me. i know it's been ages i still dunno why it happened. u know WHO U ARE...

things to wish for / to buy this year.... hmmmm

2009-01-08T14:16:00.004+08:00

1:bowling shoes @ set

2: blackberry bold (don't ask why)

3: a speaker dock for my ipod...

4: more to add... soon...

goodbye 2008... hello 2009

2008-12-28T18:25:00.002+08:00

another year will leave us and we're bound to welcome another...

many people would reflect on the year that they'll be leaving and ponder on the mistakes or the should have moments including me.. i usually would but not this time... i'll just do a brief reflection and my new years resolution..

overall the year has been somewhat filled with pathetic and memorable sad and and happy events..

amongst the pathetic events that i've crossed in the year 2008 is meeting with an accident, meeting real gays... i repeat meeting real gays... YUCKS... lesbian are acceptable though... many more to even think off i'll add them to the blog as i remember...

memorable happy... hmmm... truth be told... none... getting into medical school?? or finally starting medical school... it may be memorable... but happy, i'll have to question myself again... so in conclusion i don't think i have any happy memorable moments this year..

memorable and sad... the passing of a dear grand aunt, opah teh.. she died on the very last week of puasa.. with days to go till raya, THE ALMIGHTY ALLAH S.W.T called her to lay to rest..

another pathetic events that i would label memorable worthy of me remembering... BARISAN NASIONAL loosing the majority 2/3 in the March 8 elections... why pathetic? i think malaysians have been delusion by a certain Datuks words of promise.. some call it the political awakening... i call simple stupidity of unfulfillable promises yet a lesson to the BARISAN NASIONAL coalition..

ok.. enough reflection...

2009 resolution...

1: to do well in MAD-SCHOOL (medical school)

2: to get a scholarship

3:to strive non-academically in all aspects

4:to improve social life

5:hopefully be a better muslim

6: try be more tolerant with parents and siblings

7: HOPE FOR HER TO COME BACK

THINGS TO LOOK FORWARD TO IN 2009...

1: UMNO elections and other political party elections

2: defect in the opposition coalition

3: a more peaceful malaysia

4: someone BOMBING THE WHOLE OF IS-REAL

5:and all other good things

last but not least...

thank you GOD for a somewhat colorful 2008..

do bless me and my family and the ones i love in this coming year..

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE READING THIS BLOG....

it's true

2008-12-01T22:05:00.001+08:00

worst four weeks of medical school yet

2008-11-29T20:49:00.002+08:00

i've just completed another block of my medical school... the biochemistry block... aargh... it was horrendous... honestly i dunno what i learnt thru out the 4 weeks.. maybe a bit on nutrition... i just hope i don't fail it... next up is pathology..

in other news, we just had our sports day finals.. red house came in 3 overall... i won a gold for football and silver for futsal...

enough of college... nothing to talk about social life..

two months abandon...

2008-11-01T23:10:00.005+08:00

it's been close to 2 month since i last updated this blog.. no real or other reason why except for busy... the recent block that ended was physiology.. introductory medical physiology... it was a real challenging block yet interesting... reason being Prof Hamdan was teaching... he's tough yet a nice man...

on the other hand... a certain DR in the college has officially declared war with me... the "DR. COMPUTER KAMU ROSAK"... figure it out...

raya has ended too... huhuh... duit raya collection, hmmmm... macam economy status dunia gak la... menurun....

here are some pics that happened thru out the past month i've been away from this blog

the most controversial picture during raya celebration : i and diyana
with the chief mafia and suraya hani : chief mafia is on my left
macam nampak hantu jer!!! actually takut ngan maddy... atiq is on my right

at prof 'h' punya open house... those are all my dear boys...

MORE PICS TO COME...

the car is back

2008-09-19T23:32:00.002+08:00

got my car back a week ago thank god for that...
but a lil bit of slack tho... one side looks new the other looks old... damn... oh well
anther block is coming to an end which means another finals is coming end of this week..
behavioural science has been some what interesting...

enuf of college stuff.. boring..

so here's a song that i've been playing over and over...
As we talk the golden mile
Down the pretty aisle
I know that you are mine
And theres nothing in this world
That I know that I wont do
To be near you everyday
Every hour every minute
Take my hand and let me lead the way
All thru your life
Ill be by your side
Till death do us part
Ill be your friend
My love will never end
Till death do us part
When I wake up everyday
With you lying in my arms
I wonder if Im dreaming
When I look into your eyes
I just cant believe its true
That my heart belongs to you
Baby you can have it all
Take my hand and let me lead the way
All thru your life
Ill be by your side
Till death do us part
Ill be your friend
My love will never end
Till death do us part
Therell be good times
And therell be bad
But I will stand beside you woman
All the wayAnd thru the years
As life goes on
When snow will fall on winter nights
Ill keep you warm inside
Yeah baby I will
All thru your life
Ill be by your side
Till death do us part
Ill be your friend
My love will never end
Till death do us part

one down...10921083083 to go..

2008-09-06T22:49:00.004+08:00

it's been a month already? gosh time really flies huh?

oh well i've completed my first month of medical school with 198219839837493 more months to go.. hahah..

lets share some of the experiences here..

so the first block was GENERAL ANATOMY with the funniest Prof as of now... PROF NASARUDIN ABD AZIZ aka PROF NASAR.. at first it was OK until the SCLs started to get more and more..more SCLs=LESS SLEEP.. my record for the month was 2 sleepless nite... hurrah!!cant or shouldn't complaint though... it is med school... MAD school...half or should i say 3/4 of the day is spent at the college.. balik rumah just to tukar baju and mandi... classes start at 8 latest till 5.. then balik mandi by 8 back to college till bout 1 or 2 am.. with ping pong games with the cadaver in between... De-stress... thursday nites are "CLUBBING" NITE cuz fridays are exams day.. aargh.. so thats about it i guess... oh well of course there are side activities which need not be mentioned here but very minimal.. VERY MINIMAL...

FINALS FOR THE BLOCK WAS YESTERDAY..

IT WAS S*&T...

PRAYING FOR THE BEST...

IN OTHER NEWS...

i met with an accident..

partially my fault for moving too slow...

damn... too slow!! ya...

i also kena my first saman!!! RM 300.. WTF???

HERE ARE SOME PICS OF THE OUTCOME...

the fella who langgar-ed me punya kereta

my car kena pintu passenger side

my first saman... hahah...

date:04/09/08

issued by: sjn abd rashid ali 104493

issue no: af421012

again its been a while

2008-08-13T11:40:00.005+08:00

the feelings are still there. it just can't go away. forgive me for the lack of updates. its been quiet a while. i have been busy through out that while actually. enough with busy-ness.

i've moved on to the next stage of my life for now. it all started last thursday. fear and confusion still lingers in me, yet i can't justify why? this is the path i've choosen for this stage of life. i pray that its the rite path because i can't be sure that it is. i've heard of the worse, yet i dunno and i've not prepared myself for it. damn. why?

i am back to the environment where i once used to be, a familiar environment. but much has changed. people have changed. but the feelings haven't.

traumatised

2008-07-22T21:36:00.002+08:00

GAYS ARE A DISGRACE TO THE MANKIND ESPECIALLY MEN...

LESBIANS ARE ACCEPTABLE...

HMM...

i'm tired

2008-07-18T22:00:00.000+08:00

of this shit...

do i deserve better, deserve better i do

2008-07-16T21:19:00.001+08:00

have u ever loved and lost somebody...
wish there was a chance to say i'm sorry..
have u ever felt ur heart was breaking..
cause i loved and lost the day i let u go...
-haveyouever-

i am feeling really terrible right now...
horribly terrible...
why? can't answer that myself honestly...
well maybe i could but i just don't want too...
as idiotic as it may sound...
this feelings just eats me from the inside...
poop... shitty feelings...

will u think about the moments that we shared...
how we lived each day with no regrets...
nothing last forever though we (i) wanted to...
saying goodbye was the hardest thing to say...
i miss ur love in every way...
a true love never dies...
-saygoodbye-

it's been more than long enough since the damn day happened...
close to a year to be precise...
yet those thoughts still lingers in me...
as much as i miss them...
i was told to forget about it...
but i just can't...
#$%& this damn shit..

had a little chit-chat with the little man just now...
found out a few interesting things...
yet i was told "...honestly i think u deserve better..."
how better can i get when in me its only her that i think is the best for me...
maybe i do... her!!!

anywho...
one of my previous post is actually lyrics to a song...
hanya engkau yang mampu... by aizat...
for those who thought i actually wrote that i'm sorry u were fooled...
the reason i posted those lyrics are because of this shitty feelings...
i wonder how long more can i stand this... or even sit over it??
tell me someone...

once upon a time i was falling in love...
now i'm only falling apart...
every now and then i get lonely knowing ur no longer around..
i get nervous thinking of all those good times that have gone by...
-totaleclipsoftheheart-