Monday, December 24, 2012

you make me nauseous..

Sunday, November 11, 2012

what did i do to you that you're treating me like this...

and it's  killing me...
ur words...
ur promises...
are eating me from the inside...

Monday, October 8, 2012

tears will flow



every time i hear this song...
it never fail to bring tears to this eyes...
as strong as a person i am...
but i am weak when it comes to love...

this was ur promise to me for us...
the fact that Allah brought u to me...
Him bringing us together...
i felt it was right...
i prayed for it to be right...
but you choose otherwise...

i saddens this lonely little heart of mine...
even more when we involved Him in our promises...

Ya Rabb for u are the ever caring and even more loving...
grant me the love that i deserve...
if it is her that You have made for me...
bring us back together on the path of ur mercy...

i miss u.. SNF

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Angel Of Mine




i am gonna marry who ever sings this song to me...
muahahahaha....

Friday, September 21, 2012

i hope you'd be reminded that it isn't over

a reflection of who i am before, during and after you walked in and out on me



I let it fall, my heart,
And as it fell you rose to claim it
It was dark and I was over
Until you kissed my lips and you saved me

My hands, they're strong
But my knees were far too weak,
To stand in your arms
Without falling to your feet

But there's a side to you
That I never knew, never knew.
All the things you'd say
They were never true, never true,
And the games you play
You would always win, always win.


'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time!

Saturday, September 8, 2012

Thursday, September 6, 2012

miss this


our desktop screen was taken in the eve 23rd day...
the nite when things changed my life...
when i reshuffled everything i had plan for in my  life to make her a part of it...
well that was then i guess...
the plan still sticks for now...
until something happens...
like her getting married...

Friday, August 24, 2012

it all means nothing....

but they all mean nothing to me...
most of them are just frens....
frens who i've coaxed to be involved with me....

and clearly i see...
it hurts u...
maybe because i am rite u still do love me...

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Thursday, August 9, 2012

Butterfly



Ketika waktu mendatangkan cinta
Aku putuskan memilih dirimu
Setitik rasa itu menetes
Dan semakin parah

Bisa ku rasa getar jantungmu
Mencintaiku apa lagi aku
Jadikanlah diriku
Pilihan terakhir hatimu

Butterfly terbanglah tinggi
Setinggi anganku untuk meraihmu
Memeluk batinmu yang sempat kacau
Karna merindu

Butterfly fly away so high
As high as hopes I pray
To come and reach for you
Rescuing your soul
that previous messed up touching me and you

Jalan ini jauh
Namun kita tempuh
Bagai bumi ini
Hanya milik berdua

Biar ku berlebihan
Mendekatimu
Namun ku tunggu

Friday, July 27, 2012

find me



Find me, here in your arms
Now I’m wondering where you’ve always been
Blindly, I came to you
Knowing you’d breathe new life from within
You sleep, here in my arms
Where the world just shuts down for awhile
Blindly, you came to me
Finding peace and belief in this smile
Find some peace and belief in this smile

Can’t get enough of you

that for me it isn't over...

The best feeling in the world is realizing you’re perfectly happy without the thing you thought you needed the most.

maybe ur happy now...
i a have yet to find the happiness that i lost when u walked out on me...
but hey...
its not always a win-win situation for everyone...
you're happy i guess i have to suck it in that i am no longer the reason that makes u happy...
but know that u are every reason for me to be happy the way i was when u were around...

i miss u SNF

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Saturday, July 14, 2012

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Saturday, July 7, 2012

in search...

"if everything happens for a reason... i guess i've yet found a reason let go..."

Thursday, July 5, 2012

some things are easier said then done...

it seems to some letting go of things is easy...
even if it means letting go of some they claim to be so precious to them...
something that they've looked all their life and found it...
yet they can easily let it go...

well i am not like that...
i don't let go of things easily...
what more to something that took me so long to find...
hurting myself along the way...
i may forgive but never forget...

moving on?
after loosing the thing most precious to me...
well that...
i don't unless somewhere somehow the precious does something that can really hurt me...
if so...
then be it...





terima seadanya...


it is sad that u taught me this...
but...
like the saying goes...
"practice what u preach.."


Sunday, July 1, 2012

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

mind boggling....

i know u have moved on...
possibly someone new has already checked in...
and i am just another person u "know"...

yet i still find it hard to let u go...

words...


Monday, June 25, 2012

the pain is still there...

Ya Allah...
for u are the ever knowing and ever granting...
if u know She is for me...
then grant me the guidance towards a path u bless...

but Ya Rabb..
if u know She isn't the one for me...
grant me the the strength to overcome this heart break and heartache you have upon me...
and Ya Allah, grant her someone who is worthy of loving her...

Saturday, June 23, 2012

Monday, June 18, 2012

Friday, June 15, 2012

Saturday, June 9, 2012

of weddings and break ups...

i remembered as if it was yesterday i was talking to a close friend of mine about marriage...
i remembered how overwhelmed i was just saying the word marriage...
and today...
i saw my close fren marrying another fren of mine...
deep inside yes i do feel jealous!!!
more to that i feel sad that it was i who ended broken...

Sunday, June 3, 2012

i look forward to something like this...

Here Without You



a hundred days have made me older since the last time i saw ur pretty face...
a thousand life has made me colder...
i'm here without u baby...
but ur still on my lonely mind...
i think about u baby...
and dream about u all the time...
and tonite its only u and me...

i miss u SNF

Thursday, May 31, 2012

from a distance

that is where i will be standing...
possibly wait and hope in vain...
watch u from afar..

that is all there is to do...
i really feel like a stranger to u now...
because u treat me like one...

if only u knew...

Monday, May 28, 2012

just another rambling of mine...

first and foremost...
alhamdulillah....
i've completed my elective posting for year 4...
i decided to do an attachment with my mom...
on professional  ground that i like child and adolescent psychiatry...
but honestly, i did it just to get extra holiday...
well it really wasn't a holiday thru out the 3 weeks or so being attached with mom...
but as compared to my other colleagues, i think those who did with me were quiet lepak i would say...
hahahah... come at 10 balik at 2 sort of thing...
so yea... it was a good experience...
more of a hands on kind of thing...
we had our lecture with mom months ago... but i never really understood what she taught...
but sitting in her clinic was so much fun!
u get to see all sorts of kids...
from the really brilliant one to the mentally retarded...
yea... sad i know... but thats reality...

on another note...
again alhamdulillah...
i passed my finals for year 4...
i cleared both paper i sat for...
and surprisingly...
i did better then just passing the paper...
so again... much thanks goes to the Almighty...

next to come is  final year...
the much awaited year!!!
i'm really looking forward to it...
cuz that means i'm so much closer to graduating...
believe it...
i am actually looking forward to graduating...
yes!!!
i really need to move on...
from this...
from Cyberjaya...
where i believe i spent quiet a significant period of time at...
where great memories have been made...
and hearts has been broken...
promises were etched...
but i really am looking forward to finishing school...
after which i can start work...
speaking of which...
i can actually start thinking where i wanna work...
hurm point to ponder.. 

Sunday, May 20, 2012

the me that i dislike....

i am turning to my old self...
the one i tried hard to change...
the me that i myself do not like...
please let it not be...

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Total Eclipse of the Heart



every now and then i get a little bit lonely and ur never coming round...
every now and then i fall apart...
every now and then i get a little restless and cry like a child...
and i need u tonite...
and i need u more then ever...
cuz we'll never be wrong...

Monday, May 14, 2012

this is what Ironic means....



maybe this person should ask the question to his/herself first... 

Sunday, May 6, 2012

hiding ur past

because ur ashamed of it...
or u found new one

Saturday, May 5, 2012

All I Have



promises you made about coming thru....
so much time u wasted!!!

to some EVERYTHING IS REPLACEABLE....

yet again i am right....

girls are all the same...

maybe i'm right again....

could it be that you've proven me right again??
if yes...
i guess u are all the same...

Friday, May 4, 2012

hello

a simple hello would be nice...
i long to hear u one more time...

Thursday, May 3, 2012

anything at all...

i would do anything at all...
to be with u again...
anything...
to live those happy moments again...

for now...
all i can do is pray to Him..,
for us to be together again...
Insyallah...

Friday, April 20, 2012

tak habis-habis....

sudah lah tu wahai hati ku yang di lukai...
org xnak macm mane...
sedih mmg sedih...
tapi itu kenyataan...

i'm gonna be away for a while....
away from fb, and twitter...
and also tumblr...
to try and let go off things...
and avoid myself from reminding my self of all the sweet memories and promises...
yet...
everynight before i sleep...
i would read over 300 random messages u sent me not too long ago...
because i miss u...
yet i dont have the courage to look at ur pics in fb, twitter and ur tumblr...

i need to take some time off...
alone and learn to do things on my own again...

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

i still believe...

If there's one spark of hope
Left in my grasp
I'll hold it with both hands
It's worth the risk of burning
To have a second chance

I still believe that we can be together
If we believe that true love never has to end
Then we must know that we will love again

Someday you and me
Will find ourselves in love again...

o'Lord answer my prayers please...

i miss the thing i need most...You...

i hope ur doing great without me sayang...
i just miss u bad...
i know u've moved on...
but...
i'm still stuck loving you...
cuz i cant break that promise...

Friday, April 13, 2012

i Guess... That's Why





Love is one big illusion I should try to forget

You're the one who set it up
Now you're the one to make it stop

I'm the one who's feeling lost right now

You want me to forget every little thing you said...

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

i feel like a fool

Its never too late to pray....

I pray and hope to u Allah...
Please answer them...

Monday, April 2, 2012

For You I Will (Confidence)

i want to hear it from the horses mouth!

i dont like ppl telling me things which arent true...
so i want to hear it from the horse itself...

Sunday, April 1, 2012

why do things happen??

everything that happens are only because of 2 things!!
number 1...
u choose for it to happen...
and number 2...
u allow it to happen...

you chose to not be on the same page...
that is why we are not on the same page...
set destiny aside...
we can still choose to help chart or determine our fate...
and clearly...
i see...

this is not fair...
lets be human and talk properly... this isnt the way...
i know it'll crush me to pieces...
but i know u'll be ok...
that is what matters most to me...

easier said then done...




Saturday, March 31, 2012

not just yet...

i will not throw in the towel...
gonna hang in there till the last drop of strength i have...
i know it can be saved...
i know...

so it seems...

i'm amazed how people can just let go of things like a gust of wind...
it seems u really dont value it...
that u can just blink and let go...

Hollow

Maybe I'll just be a shadow or a nightmare of ur past after this...
Despite all the good times...
And dreams come true....

Let time take its course...
I'll not budge from my promises...

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Pucuk Dicita Ulam Mendatang

never i thought it will come to this...
we expected a few hiccups along the way...
and promised to fight on...
but those are just promises of yesterday...

till death do us part...

wahhh...
that sounds so romantic...
its actually a song....
sang by a singer White Lion...

all thru ur life...
i'll be by yourside...
till death do us part...
baby i'd be ur fren...
my love will never end...
i just cant believe its true...
that my heart belong to you...
and baby...
u can have it all...

insyaAllah...
with His grace and blessings...
i'll try my very best to make things right again...
between us...
and the parents...
lets hope all goes well..
insyaAllah...

as to u...
i really hope somewhere in you there is a tiny part that still wants to salvage this...
the most minute sign would suffice...
just signal me of ur willingness...
hope to meet u soon...

Monday, March 26, 2012

Sunday, March 25, 2012

A Thousand Years



u waited for me...
and now its my turn to wait for u...
even if it means a very long time...
or even an eternity...
so it shall be....

i've promised to love u..
for a thousand years and more...
i promise...

Saturday, March 24, 2012

let it be...

exam no exam...
i should not wait any further and torment both of us further...
there has to be a solution to everything...

i hope to talk it all out with u...
and resolve this matter amicably...
lets hope it come to a win-win situation...

promises have been made...
hearts have been spared...
let put this plan in place...
and pray for Allah's grace...
insyAllah...

Friday, March 23, 2012

HIDING MY HEART





So this is how the story went
I met someone by accident

It was in the darkest of my days
When you took my sorrow and you took my pain
And buried them away, you buried them away

And I wish I could lay down beside you
When the day is done
And wake up to your face against the morning sun
But like everything I've ever known
you'll disappear one day
So I'll spend my whole life hiding my heart away

I dropped you off at the train station
And put a kiss on top of your head
I watched you wave

I woke up feeling heavy hearted
I'm going back to where I started
The morning rain

And though I wish that you were here
On that same old road that brought me here
Is calling me home





Thursday, March 22, 2012

torn... much...

Hearts A Mess

Let me in
Where only your thoughts have been
Let me occupy your mind
As you do mine

Your heart's a mess
You won't admit to it
It makes no sense
But I'm desperate to connect
You can't live like this
  
You just threw away the key
To your heart

Love ain't fair
So there you are
My love

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

the fear....

Makes me wonder...


but i never doubted ur honesty and sincerity...

the future

Ask yourself

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Terima Kasih Cinta



Terima kasih cinta untuk segalanya
Kau berikan lagi kesempatan itu
Tak akan terulang lagi

Tanpamu tiada berarti
Tak mampu lagi berdiri
Cahaya kasihmu menuntunku
Kembali dalam dekapan tanganmu

Monday, March 19, 2012

u waited... but...

the fall...

many times before i've fallen...
and every fall i've managed to bring myself together...

but should i fall again this time...
i doubt i will ever bring myself together again...

come what may...
if He has decided for things to be this way or another...
i can only redha...
all the bitterness and pain are for me to swallow...
and hope i will somehow pick myself up again...

"i bruise easily..."
i've done all i can to prevent that...
but i guess between bruising and breaking...
the bruise will eventually heal...
but a broken heart will forever remain broken...







Sunday, March 18, 2012

I Miss You


face it...

downtherainbow:  Quinn: Wanna know a secret? I’m kinda nervous.Clay: Why?Quinn: I don’t know, because I haven’t seen you and you give me butterflies. [hides behind a pillow] There, I said it. One Tree Hill 7x13 - Weeks Go By Like Days

Quinn: Wanna know a secret? I’m kinda nervous.
Clay: Why?
Quinn: I don’t know, because I haven’t seen you and you give me butterflies. [hides behind a pillow] There, I said it.

promise..

always...

distraction

its no longer working for me...
the more i distract myself...
the more i think of you...
the more i try to do things out of the norm...
the more i think of you...
even my nights...
i have trouble sleeping...
waking up very frequently...
hoping...
wishing...
and praying...
that today would be our day again...

Saturday, March 17, 2012

all have been said...

i've never hidden anything...
even my past...
and we've learn to accept one another the way we are...
"terima seadanya"


harapan...

my only hope is for Him, the Almighty Allah swt to answer my prayers...
only He can decide and change things...

A082
Verily, when He intends a thing, His Command is, "be", and it is!

she reminds me...

wow!!

Friday, March 16, 2012

when My imagination runs wild

Quinn: You know you’re not allowed to say we’ll have a family some day unless you mean it.Clay: Of course I mean it. I love you, you goof.Quinn: Well that’s good, because I love you too.

Quinn: You know you’re not allowed to say we’ll have a family some day unless you mean it.
Clay: Of course I mean it. I love you, you goof.
Quinn: Well that’s good, because I love you too.

Friday, March 9, 2012

the impending heartbreak...

i guess its impeccable...
and i know this time...
i would be shattered to pieces badly...

worthless...

maybe i no longer mean anything to u...
yet u still mean the world to me...
regardless...


in Him i believe!!

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Terlalu Cinta


the title is a lil cliche i know...
but in all honesty and truth...
i do mean it...

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Friday, March 2, 2012

Confusion Ray

Macm Pokémon pulak dah...
Hahaha...
No but I'm serious...

I'm confused by all this signals...
Stupid me...

Has the towel been thrown or are used just dangling it over my head???

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

P.S...

You have one chance, one life and what you do with it is up to you...

P.S...

Is it me?
Am I the reason people always leave?
Am I the reason all these things keep happening to me?


Maybe I'm just destined to be alone...

P.S...


Why do relationships have to be so hard?
......'cause the only thing harder is being alone

Sunday, February 26, 2012

katakanlah...

jika benar sesuatu yang diketahui itu adalah baik untuk diri kita...
katakanlah...
demi kebaikan...
tapi...
janganlah membuat keputusan yang melulu...
janganlah membuat keputusan tanpa berdasarkan fakta...
janganlah membuat keputusan tanpa pengetahuan...
dan paling penting...
jangan bersangka buruk tanpa mengetahui apapun...

never judge a book by its cover...
that is all i am trying to say...

o'Mighty Allah...
i leave this to U...
for U have tested me in ways only U know...
give me the calm and tranquility i seek upon U...
give me the strength and Iman to face this world for the hereafter...
for U are my O' Mighty God...
my Creator...
and those of this universe...

Amin...


Never let the odds keep you from doing what you know in your heart you were meant to do...

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Too Little Too Late


It's just too little too late...
a little too wrong...
I can love with all of my heart, baby...
I know I have so much to give...

i hope time is on my side...
i really want to make it right again...
cuz it feels so damn right to be with you...



Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Thank You Allah...

so here i am in PJ...
PJ yaww... on a Wednesday nite...
very unusual kan...
but yea...
kinda of forced myself home cuz i really need to talk to ayah...

me talking to ayah???
macm tak kena je kan...
hahaha...
but yea...
a serious matter that i really needed to talk to ayah about...
something that i really couldnt hold back anymore...
and...
Alhamdulillah...
he understands...
such a big burden off my chest now..

i told him bout You..
about me...
and most importantly about Us!!!

and he's super cool about it...
i even told him of my 2015 plan...
and he said make that as ur motivation...
all is good as long as i'm ok with it and you are too...

so yea...
thats just the gist of it...
i hope we can talk things thru...
soon insyallah...

a fragile heart

A fragile heart was broken before
I don't think it could endure another pain
But there's a voice from deep inside of you
That's calling out to make you realize

It's hard I know, but oh
One thing for sure
Don't go and break this fragile heart

A hurting mind in need of emotion
I don't think I could endure another pain
But baby in you, I've found affection
Affection I have never felt before

With all this fire that burns between us
There's so much to lose
Yet so much more to gain
And if I could, choose the world around me
The world I'd choose would all revolve around you
So help me complete the game inside me
And help to mend my fragile heart

Monday, February 20, 2012

day 3

all is well...
all is well...
all is well...

InsyaAllah...
missing u much...


Saturday, February 18, 2012

James Morrison - I Won't Let You Go


And if you feel the fading of the light
And you're too weak to carry on the fight
And all your friends that you count on have disappeared
I'll be here not gone, forever holding on

I Won't Give Up

Friday, February 17, 2012

i cant hold back...

i cant help to not think about it....
i've been distracting my mind...
i've been praying hard...
but i cant hold back anymore...

i feel like breaking down...
because the thought of it makes me really sad...

i know i'm just me...
and u are more then just u to me...

u gave me hope...
i still do...
and always will...
bacause of that i've never been more sure of myself than i have of US...

no words can describe what i feel...
its more then just a simple "i love u"...




i never will....


each second seem like forever...
and forever is what i'm looking for with you...

16th Jully 2011

I’ve never experienced a long distance relationship and I certainly wasn’t excited for it, but I know that our love for each other is strong enough to withstand the distance :)

400km are between us, but we’ll make it, I have faith in our relationship :’) I miss you and I’ll be looking forward to seeing you again <3

I love you!

Together Forever Never Apart, Maybe at Distance, but Never at Heart

i feel it too...

"I waited for a very long time to give my heart to someone. Hope this is the right one..InsyaAllah"


everyday!!!

I miss my other half so bad...

this was what u said back then...
but this how i've been feeling everyday being apart from u...

my promise then, now and time to come...

Its amazing how time and distance has made me fallen deeply for u ;) goodnight..

Me : Distance is not the issue. InsyaAllah

...

Distance doesn’t matter if you really love the person. What matters most is your honesty & trust for that relationship to work out.

Thank you for putting a smile in my face ;)

"Someone Out of Town"


i remember this??
do u?? u posted this when i was in Manjung....

Tuesday, February 14, 2012